Recently I began the process of updating some of the content on my website www.spiritual-companion4u.com. In the course of re-writing the text on my Spiritual Direction page, I began to question my use of the term “healing” in the context of not only the spiritual direction I offer, but also in terms of my own spiritual growth.
What am I truly meaning to express when I use the word healing? I am comfortable when I refer to the process of healing, but not so much when I think about the idea of being healed. It is here that I start to wonder what it is that I am really trying to say. And then begin to speculate about how I will find the answer(s) for myself as I face what seems to be my growing challenge. I believe we are each born whole. Being human comes with all of its imperfections. What is it within anyone of us that would need healing?
To clarify, I am using the term healing in the context of emotional and/or spiritual healing. I find myself curious though, because as I write this, the word healing seems to be synonymous with what I consider a medical term, “cure.” (Referring to only the body?) The definition of cure and healing appeared very similar when I looked then up in the dictionary. Both imply to make good, to restore, or to recover. This feels very concrete to me, very final and not fluid. So rigid actually, that I begin to wonder if healing means there is no room for recurrence once a cure has been achieved.
Looking up antonyms for both words I read the implication that something has been damaged or that circumstances are worsening and need to be rectified rebuilt or restored. Is that what I mean when I speak about healing? Well, yes and no. Perhaps restored but no cured, rectified, or rebuilt. These are not terms I would use to refer to anyone’s heart or soul. Just because I or anyone else experiences times of hurt, anger, confusion, frustration, cowardliness, spite, even hatred, does this make us damaged in some way? I do not believe it does. Not even if we hurt others as a result of our own experiences of suffering. I am human and flawed. We are each beautifully human with our flaws and all of the facets of our perfection and imperfection.
Recently I came across an excerpt from Parker Palmer’s book, On the Brink of Everything. https://onthebrinkofeverything.com/. What I read helped me to further shine some light on my struggle. Parker wrote, “ . . . there are no shortcuts to wholeness. The only way to become whole is to put our arms lovingly around everything we know ourselves to be: self-serving, and generous, spiteful and compassionate, cowardly and courageous, treacherous and trustworthy. We must be able to say to ourselves and to the world at large, ‘I am all of the above.’”
Wholeness. This is what I have meant when I have used the word healing. Or more precisely I mean the process of returning to wholeness – of returning to the original state of being that we each came into this life with.
Okay. I now understand the direction I was headed. Wholeness is the restoration of the mind-body-spirit. Like a recovery of sorts that is part of a fluid process.
As I write the term wholeness I find it to be affirming and authentic. I believe that we are whole when we come into this world, as I stated above – no matter what our bodies look like, no matter our cognitive capacity, no matter any outward appearances. Our suffering comes when we forget our wholeness and believe that we need to fix or change something within us or outside of us so we feel better about our self, our life and the world we live in.
With wholeness, there is no need to fix or change. Only to reclaim what belongs to each of us. To reclaim our unique humanity with all of its beauty and brokenness that we call life!
Parker Palmer went on to write, “Wholeness is the goal, but wholeness does not mean perfection. It means embracing brokenness as an integral part of life. It’s a truth that can set us free to live well, and, in the end, to die well.”